On family matters
Dear brothers in faith, not so long ago we went to India on ziyarat. Our guide there was a driver from Bangladesh. He spoke Russian; apparently, he had studied in Moscow. Besides, he was quite a wealthy man, because, in general, people there live in poverty.
On our way we talked on different topics. He told us that during the conflict between Bangladesh and, if I am not mistaken Afghanistan, a young man was lost who had recently only got married. Four years later, his wife married another man, but soon the lost husband returned home alive. It turns out he had been imprisoned in Afghanistan and now released. Our driver was a Christian, but was born and lived among Muslims and herefore understood Islam and knew a lot of our laws. He said that those people had a big dispute over this issue when the husband returned home,and his wife was already married to another man.
I said, - “Why argue? Of course, the Sharia does not allow her to marry a second time, but [in this case] even though the first husband came back, she is already married to another man and should be left with the current husband.”
The driver was surprised, laughed and said, - “I have hardly told you the story when you had the answer. And they have not been able to make a decision for years.”
Think about it. They are known as an Islamic country and our Islam is only recovering after the 70 years of atheism. Even 10 years ago we had no knowledge about religion and today we get so many answers and explanations from the Ulama (Islamic scholars). Is this mercy not enough for us? May Allah help us in the future and give us a lot of Ulama! This is a great blessing for us.
Once a woman came to the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) to confide an adultery and receive Sharia punishment. She was pregnant, and the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) told her to come back after the birth of the child. Pregnant women must not be executed. After birth, she came with a baby in her arms, knowing she was going to die through stoning. And this time the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) told her to return when the child was two years old.
Two years later she came again to receive her punishment. When they ruled out to stone her, the people in the crowd began to curse her, calling her a whore. And then the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) said, “Leave her alone, repentance of this woman would be enough for the entire Ummah.”
Now, regarding the question of a woman who wants to marry, although quite advanced in years. Indeed, she is a pure, religious woman. She might have as well misbehaved. We all laughed at her question. Yet we should not be so careless about it. We must help women who want to stay righteous and have decent life.
Men often ask me to help them find a good wife and I do all I can for them. But a woman is ashamed to ask that. She shares her wish with her friend, who later tells her husband. Eventually everyone knows about it and starts laughing. “Look, they say, she is looking for a husband.” That is wrong. It is better to share her problem with an imam, because an imam knows a lot of men who also want to get married. These people need help. Moreover, it is our duty. A woman looks for a man because she wants to maintain decency. There is nothing to laugh about.
