The month of fasting as an opportunity to strengthen the family
There is an expression: spouses, who pray together, stay together! The issue of preserving and strengthening family relations is more relevant today than ever; the level of divorce around the world is off the charts. Muslims have a special period that allows them to devote time to worship and to loved ones, forgetting about everyday problems.
Improving family relationships rarely tops the Ramadan to-do list; at the very best it takes the last place in one’s schedule. However, a happy marriage and harmonious family relationships are your keys to gaining the pleasure of God.
The time has come for husband and wife to analyse their souls and to correct omissions in marriage, so that family relationships receive strong immunity from harmful interference. Here are some tips on what spouses can do together in Ramadan. And the key word here is “together”!
Ramadan is a time of golden opportunities!
You should make du’a after each prayer, addressing the Almighty with requests for what is especially close to your soul. As you fast in Ramadan, you must remember that God the Almighty accepts the du’a of a fasting person.
Together with your “soul mate”, you can make a list of the most important requests you would like to turn to the Creator with. If you have children, involve them in doing this. List everything that you want God to bestow on you, your family and your relatives in this and in the next life.
Another thing you can do together is to map out good deeds. For example, if you usually read three pages of the Koran a day, then during Ramadan set a goal to read 5-6 pages and mark the accomplished goals every day.
Ramadan is a month of mercy and forgiveness
As Satan is chained, you can look at your spouse without prejudice and try to perceive her or him just who she or he is. Let mercy and forgiveness be the red line of this month. Apply this rule whenever possible.
Try not to make comments to each other about trifling matters; say no to irritation, sarcasm, accusations, quarrels and a showdown. On the contrary, pay compliments to your wife or husband for each of her or his good deeds or words. For example, a man may say to his wife, “My dear, thank you for this wonderful dinner! You cook so deliciously!” Or a wife may say to her husband, “That’s really nice that you picked up the children from school! I was very busy and would have been late for sure.”
Such simple words can do wonders and make your soul mate always want to please you. The Prophet said, “The most complete of the believers in faith, is the one with the best character among them. And the best of you are those who are best to your women.” (Narrated by AtTirmidhi) Ask God the Almighty to forgive the sins of your spouse and reward him or her for all good deeds and for the efforts that he or she makes. Do not forget to thank God for the mercy and harmony between you as well.
Regardless of what may have been negative in your family before, try to leave it in the past and focus your energy on the positive, so as to create something new in your marriage. For example, come up with a new cozy family tradition that would unite all family.
Another tip for spouses: make up your mind on a budget for charitable purposes for this month. Even if it is a small sum of money, give it together. Maybe you will get du’a from the one you give charity to and this du’a may be the cause more happiness in your life.
And remember the intention, in all of the above and any other matters in which you are involved, make it your intention to improve your family relations, and most importantly do everything for the sake of satisfaction of the Almighty.
Just imagine: the holy month has come and you and your husband (wife) fast all day: you refuse food, drink, bad deeds and thoughts, and in the evening, hoping for a reward from the Almighty, break the fast with incredibly tasty water and dates and then have dinner with your family. This is a wonderful and unforgettable experience, which is possible only in the month of Ramadan!
Let the birth of a new moon be a metaphor for renewing your relationship. Let it be the time to correct your temper and help to improve that of your spouse, so that one day, by the grace of God the Almighty, you can enter Paradise together.
SAIDA IBRAGIMOVA
