Questions to discuss before marriage
Questions to discuss before marriage
Marriage is a delicate, important and very serious matter, and preparation for family life is even more important, because it determines the further course of the long voyage of the family ship in the ocean of life.
In previous articles, we touched on various aspects of preparation for family life and today we will try to reveal not fundamental, but nevertheless very important aspects of this fateful issue.
Housing issue
Where will the young people live after the wedding? This question is asked immediately after the idea of marriage appears. “Does the groom have his own home?” - this, in particular, is the first thing that those who come to a matchmaker are interested in. Not everyone wants their daughter to live in a rented apartment after getting married. This issue needs to be discussed in advance.
Perhaps the groom does not have his own home at the moment but there is a prospect of acquiring it - or maybe not. Perhaps the bride has her own place to live and is ready to shelter the groom in her nest. But is the groom ready for this, will he feel comfortable in “foreign territory”? There are many questions but it is necessary to decide and agree so that there are no problems.
If the housing issue is resolved, then another question arises - where do they see their future plans and how permanent are they to be. In what city or country do they want to live in the future?
There are often cases when relations in marriage become tense, when one of the spouses wants to move - for work or even just to change environment but the other does not intend to leave their current place of residence.
Before preparing for the wedding, talk about where you would like to live. Are you ready for the possibility of moving to a completely different place? Do you want to put down roots or would you not like to stay in one place for too long? Again, you may not agree completely, but it is important to know the expectations in advance, especially when it comes to things like deciding where to live. This is one of the most important things couples should do before getting married.
Ready to follow the husband to the ends of the Earth
The profession and work of the future spouses are very important for the happiness of the family. Over time, the choice of profession may change, so the young couple needs to know the main career preferences of the future second half in advance. It is important to clarify whether the spouses are ready to move to another place if suddenly work or other circumstances require it. The future wife should understand who she is marrying if the husband’s profession involves moving or long business trips.
Perhaps someone enjoys traveling the world and changing jobs often. While others may prefer to settle down in one place due to the nature of their career.
If the future spouses miss all these opportunities to learn about each other before marriage, this can lead to serious conflicts in the future.
Priorities, career and family
Another important issue is the career issue. Are the spouses ready to accept the profession, the type of work of their other halves. Many may not agree with the fact that due to their job they have to cross paths with the opposite sex and for this reason they demand that their spouse change jobs. This issue should also be discussed before marriage to avoid problems in the future.
Given the number of divorces in the modern world, it is advisable for future spouses to share what they will never be able to compromise on, for example, their career or other priorities.
You cannot live without certain things and is your partner ready to respect this?
Before getting married, the parties can talk about their priorities and what they do not like. Answer the question of whether they are ready to respect the priorities of their partner.
It is worth discussing this and seeing what each person wants from their life and what their personal boundaries are. These little things can help you better prepare for marriage, understand, accept and love each other as they are.
In-laws
It would not hurt for the young couple to look and even take a closer look at their future in-laws to understand their cultural characteristics, customs, traditions and tell themselves whether they are ready to accept such relatives and live with them.
In this way, the young people will find out what their future in-laws really want and what they expect from them.
In the future, they will not only live with their spouse but also be in the circle of his family. Therefore, it is important to make sure that they get to know these people better and understand whether they can adjust to them.
In order to learn how to be a good wife or husband, you need to ask yourself difficult questions. How close do you think your relationship with them will be?
Jokes about mothers-in-law have been around since time immemorial, so you will not be the first person to feel a little awkward because of these new relatives but life will be much easier if you treat them with respect from the very beginning. We wish everyone good luck on this difficult path to family happiness.
