Let us not break ties of kinship
In previous times, if discord were to occur between men, a woman could remove a scarf from her head and throw it between them so that they parted, since they did not dare to look at her naked hair. Nowadays, however, there are women who permit themselves to walk about without a head covering; they do not possess the faith that would protect them from sin, there being no men in their families who are capable of raising them properly.
It is men who are first and foremost to blame in this respect. A hadith of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) tells us, “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for his flock.” (Narrated by Al Bukhari and Muslim)
The imam of a mosque in one of the cities of Tunisia delivered what was probably the shortest sermon in the world, uttering only the following words, “There is no good in your prayer while your women are undressed ” and then ordered the prayer to commence. Dear brothers, to show indifference in such an urgent matter is considered to be the same as betrayal.
Most of the grave sins we commit are due to ignorance. Some people think that the gathering of men and women at the same table is permissible, believing that only during mawlids should they sit separately (this does not concern the wives of our sons and the husbands of our daughters, as they are mahrams for us, and our religion allows us to treat them like our own children).
Islam encourages believers to gather with their whole family, with brothers and sisters, as once they did in childhood, as this strengthens the relationship and love between them. Unfortunately, in real life we often see that siblings prefer relationships with more distant rich relatives and friends, rather than with close relatives who are not well off and brothers and sisters. Such behaviour contributes to the severing of kinship ties, which in the Koran the Almighty commanded us to protect and preserve.
Our tongue brings many troubles which lead to the breakdown of family relations and more. Instead of quietly sitting down and discussing problems and misunderstandings that may arise, some of us, in anger and at the instigation of Satan, draw hasty conclusions and set about accusing and offending their innocent relatives. And then, when they find out that they were wrong, pride (Satan intervening here as well) does not allow them to admit their guilt. Such attitudes contribute to the weakening of family ties: there is no need to look for the guilty when you are to blame yourself.
A hadith of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) says, “A person may utter a word that he thinks harmless, but it results in his falling into Hellfire [the depth of] 70 years [in travel].” (Narrated by At Tirmidhi) Thus, one carelessly spoken word can cause you to shed tears for many years. Remember, when you drive a nail into a person’s soul it will leave a wound there forever and none of your apologies can help.
Therefore, dear brothers and sisters, let us not plunge ourselves into such difficult situations, but if we do, immediately ask for forgiveness from the one who was offended for the sake of Almighty Allah, because until the person himself forgives us, we cannot expect forgiveness from the Lord.
It is narrated from Abu Huraira (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day must either speak good or remain silent.” (Narrated by Al Bukhari, Muslim)
This hadith clearly indicates that it is necessary to speak only when words contain an obvious benefit but when there are doubts about their usefulness one should be silent.
SHAMIL MAGOMEDOV Theologian
